Guilt, Regret, Embarrassment
Dusk.  (at Downtown Palm Springs)

Dusk. (at Downtown Palm Springs)

Checked out the infamous Salton Sea today. It’s hot and gross and smelly and weird and there are lots of dead fish. But it sure is fascinating.  (at Salton Sea)

Checked out the infamous Salton Sea today. It’s hot and gross and smelly and weird and there are lots of dead fish. But it sure is fascinating. (at Salton Sea)

Palm Springs mini-vacation with my gorgeous wife. I sure do love this girl.  (at Matchbox Palm Springs LLC)

Palm Springs mini-vacation with my gorgeous wife. I sure do love this girl. (at Matchbox Palm Springs LLC)

How'd you get Farfel?

This is a long story. And you all know how it ends. So feel free to skip this.

One evening a little grey stripey kitten showed up on my back patio. He was scratching at my sliding glass door so I decided I’d let him in and see how my cat, Syd, would react. Surprisingly, she was totally cool with this kitten. He came inside and jumped right up on the couch and fell asleep. A few hours later when it was time for bed, I put this little kitten outside, but he cried and cried and scratched at the sliding glass door until I let him back in. From then on, he never left. The night he moved  in, I was watching the Farfel episode of ‘Seinfeld,’ so I decided to call this kitty Farfel. He never left my side, actually. I wasn’t working at the time (I had recently sold my house for a huge profit, plus I was a drug addict incapable of getting and holding a job), so I spent all day around the house, with Farfel at my side.

Cut to 3 months later: my girlfriend at the time had just arrived home from work. She entered the front door and Farfel ran outside (as cats are wont to do). As she was collecting him a neighbor lady happened to be walking by and said “oh my god, that’s my cat!! he’s been missing for a little while and we’ve been looking all over for him and my daughter is so lost without him. Thank you for finding him. I can’t wait to take him home - my daughter will be so happy.” My GF explained to her that Farf has been living with us for the past 3 months and we have never seen any “lost cat” posters or anything, so you obviously weren’t looking very hard. She also explained how Farf and I had bonded and how he never left my side and how devastated I would be if she were to take him away. Still, she took Farf away, told my GF what condo she lived in and said I should come talk her if necessary.

Right around this time, my old roommate had moved out. He still owed several hundreds of dollars in back rent and bills, so he left me his early 90’s Mazda as payment. Whatever I sold it for should more than cover what he owed me.

So I went to see our neighbor. I explained to her how much I loved Farfel, how much we had bonded, how important he was to me. But she didn’t care. To add insult to injury, her little shit of a daughter stood behind her, holding Farf against his will (he was uncomfortable and squirmy and just didn’t want to be held), talking about how much she missed “her” cat. I told the mom that I’d do anything to get him back. Anything she wanted. Then it hit me - I still have my old roommate’s car. So I offered her the car. I straight up said “I’ll give you this car if you let me have Farfel back.” She agreed, but only if I gave her the title (understandably), which I didn’t have. I immediately ran home and called Miah (my old roommate) and asked him for the title. He told me he’d try to find it, but that it would take a little time.

So I went back to the neighbor, explained the title situation, and told her I’d give it to her as soon as I got it. She said ok, but she was going to keep Farfel (or Sparkles or Cuddles or whatever shit name they had given him) until then. I was heartbroken, but I knew full well that given the chance, Farfel would come back to me. Whether I had the car title or not.

About a month later, I still didn’t have the title, so I still didn’t have Farfel. My friend Burns showed up to my place, probably to buy, use, or share drugs. When I opened the front door he said, “hey man, that’s so rad that you got Farfel back!” I had no idea what he was talking about so he dragged me outside and pointed me towards the window of my office. Farfel was sitting outside my office window hoping to come inside. I grabbed him and hugged him and kissed him and cried and never let him go.

Almost a month later the neighbor showed up at my front door. She told me that Farfel had been missing for about a week (!!!), and was wondering if I had seen him. I told her that I hadn’t. She then told me, “well, if he shows up, let me know. If you just give me maybe $25 for gas, you can keep him.” I agreed to her deal, and told her that I’d be sure to let her know if I ever saw him again. She went on her way and I never saw her again.

And that’s the story of how I got Farfel, my favorite boycat, and the cat-love of my life.

TL;DR: A cat found me.

Got my Graveface Records shirt in the mail yesterday. Lo and behold it glows in the dark!!

Got my Graveface Records shirt in the mail yesterday. Lo and behold it glows in the dark!!

The shuttered Crown International Pictures building. I was tempted to climb up and steal the crown logo off the sign. (at Crown International Pictures)

The shuttered Crown International Pictures building. I was tempted to climb up and steal the crown logo off the sign. (at Crown International Pictures)

I wonder how many awards this song and video won. Probably all of them.

How stoked is the drummer?

Stoked to finally own a The Party of Helicopters shirt. Thanks, @theminorthread!!

Stoked to finally own a The Party of Helicopters shirt. Thanks, @theminorthread!!

"Ugh, god…fuckin’ Tumblr."

- Rachel

fuckyeahjerm:

cannibalczar:

tastefullyoffensive:

Perfectly Timed Dog Photos [boredpanda]

Previously: Before and After Pictures of Animals Growing Up

fuckyeahjerm

Dogs, man. Dogs.

Puppies!!

Once you get this you have to say five things you like about yourself, publicly, then send this to ten of your favorite followers (non-negotiable). Actually I'm only sending this to you & you didn't do it last time so YOU HAVE TO OK.

FINE.

  1. I’m a real pleasant, real friendly dude. 
  2. I’m super compassionate and loving of all animals.
  3. I like the weird grey patches in my beard.
  4. I like how creative I am. Just wish I’d do more with it.
  5. I like that I was strong and driven enough to overcome some pretty serious demons to totally straighten out my gnarly (self-imposed) shitty existence.

This was actually way harder than I thought it’d be. Ha ha.

wearenothing:

There goes the neighborhood.
http://www.ticketfly.com/purchase/event/675463?utm_medium=bks

Whoa. Nothing, Trash Talk, and Body Count all on the same bill?? This show will be epic.
What the fuck is Jewel’s Catch One though?? Never even heard of it. 

wearenothing:

There goes the neighborhood.

http://www.ticketfly.com/purchase/event/675463?utm_medium=bks

Whoa. Nothing, Trash Talk, and Body Count all on the same bill?? This show will be epic.

What the fuck is Jewel’s Catch One though?? Never even heard of it. 

Hung some new (f)art in our home. We got our kickass Milliner wedding poster framed and hung at the top of the stairs next to our Italian House By The Cemetery 2-sheet. And got our Italian La Casa 3/Ghosthouse locandia framed and hung in the upstairs hallway underneath our killer Munk One Night of the Living Dead print.

Once you get this you have to say five things you like about yourself, publicly, then send this to ten of your favorite followers (non-negotiable)
  1. My penis
  2. My wang
  3. My dong
  4. My johnson
  5. My Hank Hill butt

10 of my favorite followers have to do this. I’m way too apathetic to send you messages. If you think you’re one of my favorites, you’re probably right*, so go for it.

*wrong